Saturday, 15 December 2012

From one income to none: the encore

Time for triage on Planet Baby again
Ah Lovelies. I can't thank you enough for all your emails, text messages, phone calls and Facebook messages enquiring about my wellbeing. You are all so kind. It flummoxes me, actually. 

Frustratingly, on Monday our fortunes took a huge dive. 

Mr PB lost his job. Just when he was getting over January's shock, the poor fellow.

It's a dreadful way to bookend our year. And horrid timing just before Christmas.

So we're in triage phase again, sorting out our priorities.

Notifying the relevant people and organisations.

Doing our sums. Calculating. Guessing. And hoping.

My main priority right now is looking after Mr PB. He's had to be strong for so long, just to look after me. He's such a good man. And, unsurprisingly, it's taken its toll on his health.

Now I'm feeling a bit better, it's my time to step up to the plate and shoulder some of the load so he can get better.

Curiously, this time around doesn't feel as devastating as last time. Maybe it's because I know we can get through this again.

Part of it is also because in the short term, it forces him to take a rest as most businesses will be shutting down or working with skeleton staffs for the next few weeks. That means they won't be there to receive his job enquiries. He hasn't had a day off, outside of the public holidays, for 8 months. And he's been the sole breadwinner for 6 of the past 7 years. No wonder he's worn out! 

And the other part is because it also gives him an opportunity to finally seek some career advice. For the longest time, he's questioned whether he's in the right field. Now he can ask some experts for guidance.

We're not sure where this path will lead. I'm trying very hard not to be scared. And to embrace the potential of change.

I just have to encourage him to do that as well.

Not to mention ensuring the pixies still feel loved and secure, despite all the uncertainty swirling around us.

The few souls with whom we've shared our news have surprised us with extraordinary generosity.

Planetarians have visited and hugged me. They've phoned, emailed and texted me. They've had groceries delivered to our door. They've prepared us pizza dough and given us all the fresh ingredients for making our dinner. Not to mention a bottle of chardonnay to accompany it! They've met me in the park and consoled me whilst our children have played. They've offered to look after the pixies and even pay bills.

I am just staggered. And overwhelmed. I can't thank you all enough, let alone understand why all this generosity is being channelled our way. I'm not fishing for compliments - I mean that most genuinely.

I just have to be gracious and accept people's help. That's the best way I can thank them as it allows them to feel satisfied and enjoy their giving.

So, my blogcation will continue indefinitely whilst we get back on our feet. I trust you'll understand. I miss you all terribly but blogging takes so much energy from me, I need to conserve all I have to tackle our challenges.

I hope to pop by around Christmas time, though - I can't miss out on sharing that time with you all!
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Comments (34)

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Oh lovely, sweet Jane. You are such a strong woman, it WILL all be ok. I'm just so sorry this path has presented again, and at this time of year. Bless your pizza making dough friends - that is gorgeous. I'd love to help from a distance, let me know if there is anything practical I can do xxx
Catherine's avatar

Catherine · 644 weeks ago

Oh Jane I am so sorry to hear that this has happened. You seem to have so much strength right now, this is so good to hear. That you are positive and taking this as a challenge rather than an obstacle. Take care dear lady. May this unfortunate circumstance bring many positive things for all of you, it sounds like you have much support to help you along the way. You are in my thoughts. Big hugs to you. xxxx
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Hi Jane, I'm sorry to hear that Mr PB has lost his job. I am glad though, that it will be an opportunity for him to be home with his children (and you!) over Christmas at least. I know it isn't easy financially and am so glad that people near you have been able to help. I hope something comes up for him in January and the strain eases very soon.
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Mama of 2 boys's avatar

Mama of 2 boys · 644 weeks ago

Oh Jane, what a terrible blow. Never a good time, but around the Christmas period, just that much tougher. So sorry to read this news. It can only get better lovely, try to keep reminding yourself of this. The show of support you are receiving is in every way a reflection on the incredible friend you are to so many. Embrace the kindness and try to enjoy a lovely Christmas with your delightful pixies xoxo
I'm sorry to hear that you've been experiencing a bump in the road...I hope something wonderful comes your way soon :) It's lovely to hear of all the support and love you're closest and dearest are showering you with. Keep positive lovely xxx

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¡Hola Jane! So sorry to hear that! I was expecting some news about Christmas Down Under! I hope life will be much better for you and yours in 2013. Sending you online hugs from Spain! Marta
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As you know Jane, I hold high hopes for a much much better year next year, especially for Mr PB. He needs to take it as a good opportunity to turn things around, find a much happier place. You know full well that I know how hard it is living without income - no fun at all, but how winderful that your friends are so supportive. Will call you this week xx
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Oh Jane, I am so sorry to hear that. I am sure there will be a silving lining,as you and Mr PB deserve that.
It's a busy crazy time of year, so I am not sure I will catch you before Christmas, but if I can help with anything please let me know.
I think a few drinks and a chat are in order (my shout) soon!
Take care, stay positive and I hope Mr PB gets the rest he needs and a new direction for next year.
Thinking of you all. xx
Goodness Jane, you are having more than your share of bad luck. Fingers crossed there is good news on the horizon x
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Amanda W.'s avatar

Amanda W. · 644 weeks ago

Good Luck! I hope this break will help you guys set your lives on a new path that will bring you both great joy! I too am at a cross roads and it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. You are not alone and you are in the thoughts and hearts of many. I do hope you will let us know what new wonderous roads this change will take you guys.
Hi dear Jane,
There are some gifts coming your way from us. And, I believe, quite a few others too.
I heard through the sad news bloggy grapevine and put out a call to friends to ask if they could help. I do hope that's okay? Almost a dozen people have asked me where they can send things to you. They live as far afield as Perth and Los Angeles, and some of them are complete strangers. The kindness is overwhelming. So you may get some surprise envelopes and parcels in the post. Some can only afford to send Christmas cards to boost your morale; others are trying to send a little more.
Please know that lots of people care for you, and are here for you and your family.
Sending you a big hug to cheer you up.
We love you very much.
Janelle
1 reply · active 643 weeks ago
Oh Janelle. You are such an angel.

I can't thank you enough for your extraordinary generosity and kindness of heart.

This email has been waiting for a reply for over a week. I'm so sorry for the radio silence but life has been very fraught here,requiringall my energy to allow us to limp over theChristmasfinish line.

I have also beenoverwhelmed by your compassion and unable to put my thoughts into words. But now I can't rest until I've tried.

You have such a huge heart and anenormous well of compassion.

It took me days to work out that you had posted about us on your blog. I was sooverwhelmedit then took me a while longer to read it. What a beautiful post, you gorgeous girl. It blew me away. I have been back a few times and re-read it, tears pricking my eyes. I will add a proper comment tonight to thank you.

I am moved beyond measure at your gesture. You wrote about us with such a loving and wholehearted heart. I could scarcely believe how well you had gleaned how we are raising the children and also the tremendous strain we are under. Priceless.

Your amazing gesture prompted 6 of your delightful readers to send us magnificent missives of love. They were:

* Maggie Rylands $100 cheque
* Paula McLaughlin $ 50 Coles Myer voucher
* Claire Lindsey $ 30Coles Myer voucher
* Ridder family $100 Woolworths/Big W voucher
* Pamela McDonald $ 40 Big W voucher
* Linda McCorquodale $250Woolworths/Big W voucher plus a parcel which I haven't opened yet

Oh my stars. Thankyou from the bottom of my heart.Youhaveliterally helped put food on our table and buy Christmas presents. We are hosting lunch for my family tomorrow - 9 adults and 7 children under 8. I will take extra pleasure in eating the food, knowing that you helped in its purchase.

I woulddearlylove to have a chat sometime soon if you don't mind. My number is (03) 6228 4189 if you feel so inclined.

I am soooo behind in catching up on your life - I think your last 14 posts are waiting for me to read them! I trust and hope you are well and happy.

I wish you the most joyous Christmas with your dear ones, Janelle. Thankyou for making such abeautifuldifference to our lives.

All my love

Jane x
Life on Planet Baby

From: notifications@intensedebatemail.com
To: jane1970@live.com.au
Subject: Life on Planet Baby - New comment on: From one income to none: the encore
Hello Jane. I just popped by to see your lovely blog, after not visiting for eons, and read your news. I am very sorry for Mr PB. My sweet, the universe has another plan it seems. I hope it is all revealed very very soon for you all. You have incredible strength, and now is your time to shine. Tough times make us even more grateful for those we love. I lost my job in Qld Health two weeks ago, but I know we'll be ok, because I have a hunk-a-spunk husband who supports and adores me, two healthy kids, and the cutest Kelpie in town!
sending exceptional Jane love to you as you travel this bumpy road.
Jane x
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Mother Down Under's avatar

Mother Down Under · 644 weeks ago

I have been meaning to email you Jane...I was just waiting for the right words...but I suppose that there aren't really any right words except that I am so sorry that this seemingly bad thing has happened to good people.
I have been thinking about you...and I know you are in the hearts of many others as well.
Please don't be afraid to ask for help, or to accept help! We all want to support you in any way possible.
Sending love and hope your way,
Caitlin
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Sending love and light xx
The timing sucks and I feel for you. You have a parcel coming your way that is just for you, because I know that you'll put yourself last, and I've sent a card too.

Stay strong.

So many people care.

x
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hello jane, i found my way here through janelle's blog. i'm so sorry to hear about your financial struggles. i can relate as 2009 was a terrible year for us. the worst ever. but we got through it and so will you. from what i understand you are quite strong and funny. that is a killer combo you know?!

please hug your children tight today, they are your strength. in light of the horrific events in the US, you are quite rich really. much love and kindness from southern california. xo janet
Hey Jane. I emailed you.

I am so glad that you are surrounded by good and loving people. Yes, accept help! God uses people to do his work too.

love Fi xxx
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Chrisartist's avatar

Chrisartist · 644 weeks ago

Hi Jayne
I once lived through this and happy to say we came out smiling.
We sold our waterfront home and renovated a cheapie. Once we had income again we re sold and bought a house at the beach.
Take care Jayne. There are many ways to achieve positive outcomes.
Your health and family are most important at this time.
Chrisx
Lisa@RandomActsOfZen's avatar

Lisa@RandomActsOfZen · 644 weeks ago

Oh Jane, you really are being tested! I think about you often, and have been sending positive thoughts your way.
I guess the best way to look at something like this is to think "Well, we got through that OK, anything else is a breeze."
Please let me know if I can help in any way. You are truly missed in this online world. Much love and hugs to your gorgeous family.
Lisa xx
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sometimes these things are a blessing in disguise- especially if it leads Mr PB on a new career path, almost wish something like that would happen to my hubby as he is just so unhappy in his job, but too scared to quit incase he can't get another job, I think we could make a go of a little business together, but I think he needs a little push.
'Hope Mr PB can have a restful couple of weeks before deciding what to do next.
Prayers for you and yours
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Anastasia's avatar

Anastasia · 644 weeks ago

So sorry to hear that Jane – I do believe when One door shuts another will open…wishing you all the luck during this difficult and uncertain time – be positive as Im sure he’ll find something new and challenging in the new year ahead!
My husband resigned suddenly a couple of months ago and I was angry with him for a day or two as I felt he let his boss win but I think as well because I was scared of the unknown of losing that ‘comfortable & settled’ feeling I had. I realised that he was stressing too much and working such ridiculous hours that it was affecting him as a person, as a dad, as a husband…so when they told him they expected more from him, enough was enough.
He is now contracting and is feeling much happier about work and the life balance.

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Roxane P-CH · 644 weeks ago

My heart went out to you all reading this as the feeling was too familiar here in our little abode this year as well. Literally weeks after the birth of our son S was made redundant. As I read of no breaks or holidays I couldn't believe the similarity in our stories from, possibly not so surprisingly, the same home town. I admit to feeling sick at the time and empty when people would say it would be ok. But it was and is. Actually, it's better. I sincerely hope the same becomes true for your family. As I said to my partner, you will not be unemployed forever, this is only temporary. Until then wishing you all the best, a happy Christmas and a new year that will bring new opportunities and peace of mind.
Oh Jane, I'm so sorry I haven't been around in blogland and have been seemingly unsupportive of all that's happened to your family...just saw your comment on my blog and thought I'd better pop across and catch up on all your latest posts and am so sorry to have read about Mr PB losing his job. You are so strong and positive amongst all that is swirling around you but I have confidence that something better will find its way to Mr PB. Much love to you all xx
Popping over to see how you are going. I wish we lived closer, so i could do something in person. Sending you big wishes & hugs, you sound stronger than ever. Wishing you a beautiful Christmas as you know how lucky you are in love & family, love Posie
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Jane, I've been thinking of you and wishing you and your family only the best. Trying to be supportive but I don't know how to help... Love, Naomi
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Jane, you definitely have your
priorities in the right place.
Follow your heart and your
instincts and you will be on
the right track.

Hoping that your husband
is feeling more rested, already!

Merry Christmas, sweet friend.

xo Suzanne
Elizabeth gentile's avatar

Elizabeth gentile · 643 weeks ago

Hi Jane, pryers are with you and your beautiful family. No matter what life throws at you, you stand up and face it but you are also allowed to have your moment of self pity and a couple of glasses of vino to get through it ;0) look after your husband because men are the last to admit their not coping and its prime time for a mid life crises :( yet he has proven to you over the last year that he is a strong leader of your family unit and will so again no matter what his chooses are in the new year. If you ever need to get in the car and drive my door is always open (and lots for the kids to see and do at my house!) love to you all xxxxxxxx liz
What a bombshell Jane, sorry to hear this. I am so impressed by your positive post. It must be so helpful to Mr PBS to have such sensible support. I hope you find something in the new year. I hope you can take some time to enjoy Christmas with the pixies. Deb
Hi Jane,
I'm so sorry to read about your situation. But I can say from experience that something better will come your way.I hope you can still enjoy CHristmas and cherish the moments and things you have, and that are most important. Thinking about you from the other side of the world.
HUG
Louise
The Silver Bunny's avatar

The Silver Bunny · 642 weeks ago

Oh, Jane, I am just catching up on your blog and I am so so sorry to hear those terrible news. I hope Christmas surrounded with the love of your family has put a bit of balm on your sorrow. Both you and your husband sound like very brave souls and I am sure you will bounce back and maybe this break in your husband's career will turn out to be for the better ... I feel all the more flattered that you took some time to comment on my blog ! Lots and lots of love to you and your pixies and, what the heck, being French, to your husband too ! Kisses from Paris xx
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How completely frustrating about the job. But the deconstruction must come before a new beginning, so here's to that.
Merry Christmas I hope it was a good one for you. Congrats on the easy store too. Shall pop over and have a look.
Here's to a good 2013 for you.
Carolyn
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Desire empire's avatar

Desire empire · 642 weeks ago

That of course was etsy store.
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Thinking of you Jane and hoping that Christmas went well. Here's hoping that 2013 brings a good balance of work and family time. Starting with a good job for your lovely husband.
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